Dealing with Naysayers

January 19, 2018

One of the artists that I mentor recently had an odd experience. She has been posting covers online and although 99% of the comments have been uplifting and quite inspiring...

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One of the artists that I mentor recently had an odd experience. She has been posting covers online and although 99% of the comments have been uplifting and quite inspiring – she got that bad review.

What made it harder than usual is that it was from someone who knew her. They not only posted under the video but then sent her a private messaging questioning everything from song choice to arrangement but also if she was making the right choice putting herself out there. “Maybe just join a choir to explore your artistic side as you aren’t that talented” The naysayer felt.

This beautiful young artist was heartbroken especially since it wasn’t some random person but someone who she knows and loved. I also really believe that the naysayer probably had the best intensions – probably believed that she was helping this singer. Something to remember when talking with people – our words are so powerful. When our mothers told us: “Think before you speak!” They were totally right.

Regardless of that — first and foremost remember that with music – it is all about taste. I might love an artist but then you might absolutely hate them. Am I right or are you? We are both right …. One we probably have a different check list in deciding if something is good and two we have different tastes and likes so naturally we won’t like the same things. But it isn’t our place to tell an artist to quit or give up.

Here’s some interesting facts:

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1. Shakira’s vocal teacher told her she would never be able to find success as singer as she had an “odd” voice. I think her unique voice is what made her famous.

2. Alicia Keys’ professors in music school told she would never find success so much that she ended up not finishing school. I know I wouldn’t have taken that first step as a singer/pianist without seeing her going mainstream.

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Alicia Keys

3. Fred Astaire was told by MGM “ Can’t act. Can’t Sing, Slightly bald but can dance a little” The rest is history but good point is that he kept that note too keep him humble. I remember reading that he said once: “When success goes to a dancer’s feet, wonderful but when it goes to his head – the dancer is in trouble!” Something I try to remind myself on a regular bases.

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Fred Astaire

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Lucille Ball


4. Lucille Ball was regarded as a failed actress but hmmm she only won 4 Emmy’s, received 13 nominations for Emmys and oh ya won a Lifetime Achievement Award from the Kennedy Centre. And just an inspiration for so many humans out there including yours truly.

5. Outside of the art world, there is always my favorite social media geru and modivatoration speaker – Gary Vaynerchuk who says he respects his haters because they have an opioion – a response to his material as often people don’t like to offend anyone anymore so he knows where he stands and as it gives him valuable feedback how to become better. He is rare in the sense though — not sure if we could all take it.

I could go on Beethoven, Caruso etc. …. So many – if you want a bigger list –

So remember although it is never easy to deal with naysayers – everyone gets them. Remember does everyone like you a person? No so why would they like your music too? Just surround yourself with a strong support system that can provided you with positive constructive crizitism but help you work through the often “haters” who are haters outs of jealous. How to do that! Hmmmmm another blog?

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